The Attitude That Signals Success
Just recently, a very successful client of mine showed me that he was ready to go to the next level, and it’s of super, super important attitude adjustment to make, and I’m going to share it with you in the very next segment.
I love my job. I get a chance to meet some of the greatest people on the planet, wonderful, wonderful chiropractors, and I get a chance to teach them and I get to coach them and I get to do that in the context of some great events. Right now, I’m in Dallas and I’m at the Highland Hotel, and we’re going to do our galaxy group right over there in that room tomorrow. And then, on Saturday and Sunday, we’re going to do win-win associates in my side, and then George is going to take the group through from zero to 200 in record time.
So, it’s a great event, lots of nice people, but let me tell you this story. I have a very successful client, and like many, many successful people, he has become successful because he knows how to get what he wants. In other words, he’s got very, very strong opinions, and those strong opinions and his ability to push has made him a successful person, but just recently, he made an attitude shift that tells me that he is ready to go to the next level when it comes to developing associates, and in the next segment, I’m going to share with you exactly what that is.
Over a number of years, I’ve developed 70 plus associates, most of them quite successful and over that time, I have had a very, very strong opinion about what success was and what a good associate was and how to develop a good associate, but what I learned was that I didn’t always communicate as clearly as I needed to, and I learned to go through a process where I took responsibility to make sure that my associates understood exactly what I was talking about so that we could work together in a win-win relationship. And here’s what’s happening with my client, again, very, very strong guy, very strong opinions, very successful, a high L personality, in fact, he’s an L-A, and that L-A personality knows what they want, and they understand the detail, and frequently, it would be the failing of that personality is to think that everybody thinks like them. Well, there was this misunderstanding between him and his associate, and he told me that it very well could have led to a firing and this was just within the first few days and I encouraged him to be a little bit more flexible, to take responsibility, and to clarify. So, he went to his associate and he said, “Let’s make sure that we’re on the same page.” The first place he went to was the shared wins.
My client wants to win by getting help, getting freedom, and being able to make extra money for the clinic. The associate wants to win because they want a big money job and they want to be trained and they want a successful future. So, went back to those wins. So, this is why we’re in this, then stepped into the center and said this is how we will do this and worked at clarifying what were some miscommunications and what my client said to me is he said, “I had to check my spirit.” Now, I think that’s code for I just had to be willing to be flexible when flexibility isn’t this person’s biggest strength and then number two, he needed to not be judgmental. If you have strong opinions, and if you’re a very successful person, you can take a look at something and you can probably run a pretty accurate judgment on what’s going on, but what you don’t want to do is be judgmental because that can hurt a relationship really badly and so, they went and they had this conversation, and one of the things that he said which is a favorite phrase of mine is, “You know, I’m terribly sorry, “I don’t think I was as clear as I needed to be.”
Now, with that particular phrase, with that particular sentence, and with the attitude behind it of let’s clear this up because I don’t accuse, I’m not judging, what happens is that you get a chance to get on the same page and the same direction. How many different times have I in my life been wrong about what somebody else was thinking, and I had to clarify, and I had to ask a question like, help me understand, what was your thinking here? Oh, okay, well that’s not the way we do it. Here’s the way we do it and let me tell you why. Dr. George Birnbach talks about fact, reason why, coupling patterns. Fact, reason why, coupling patterns and so this is the fact, this is how we do it, and here’s why and what that does is that brings the associate along.
Now, the reason, the reason I say that this signals for my client his ability to go to the next step. The person with the strong opinion, the very, very successful person who pushes, may at times, have a rough time putting a team around them and if you’re willing to not only be certain about what you want, but also be flexible and non-judgmental and take responsibility in the relationship for everybody understanding what’s going on, that’s the way you go to the next level, that’s the way you bring a team around you. That’s the way that you have your team feel and say about you, this person cares for me, and that I understand, and you don’t go blowing people up, you can’t do that.
I’ve known some wonderfully successful people who just couldn’t put a team around them because they wouldn’t make that attitude adjustment. They wouldn’t go to that position. It really is servant leadership, taking responsibility to make sure everybody understands what’s going on, and going the second step in order to make sure that they get it.
This is Dr. Noel Lloyd for Five Star Management and for more great leaders becoming even better leaders by not only having a good picture of where you want to go, but also think flexible, taking responsibility and making sure that everybody understands this is where we’re going and doing it in a way that you’d like to happen to you. Talk to you later. Bye Bye.